please turn off the bad french pop! (petit robert bistro)

petit robert bistro, 468 comm ave, visited : 30 april (6pm), 1 may (6:30pm)

saturday.
the buzz on the restaurant was good. i had really just sent the review from the globe to french house because the restaurant’s manager is loic le garrec – the name of the doctor in “a la folie…pas du tout” (he loves me, he loves me not) if you remember it. if you don’t, or if you have no idea what i’m talking about, you should go rent this movie from the video store.

walking into the restaurant requires you to walk down a narrow set of concrete steps, which lead into a charming little restaurant that really seems to take you into a different world (in contrast to the collegiate/brownstone atmosphere of kenmore square). wait at the threshold, where oddly enough, the main coatrack is in the anteroom, offering free access to anyone, and you will theoretically be greeted by the hostess. we were greeted by the hostess, but apparently our coats were not deemed to be special enough to be hung on the coatrack indoors. oh well.

we were seated on the lower level, near the pastry bar. the restaurant was barely half full, but we settled into our table quite nicely. first things first : to the manager of the restaurant, please do not cycle the same short playlist of bad french pop four times in three hours. the first song sounded like elevator music, and i’m sorry, but i am not a fan of hearing zazie’s “j’envoie valser” four times in one evening.

the next thing i noticed : our water glasses were refilled constantly. and by constantly, i mean every two or three minutes. i am all for full water glasses, but they were a little bit overattentive in this respect. on the other hand, when bread arrived, it was wonderful and so hot as to be steaming when we cracked it open. luckily, the bread was replenished as nicely as the water, so we were never in want of it. this is one of the few restaurants that actually serves bread correctly, and in fact, it might take first place honors in this respect. i can’t remember the last time i’ve had such good bread at a restaurant, come to think of it. its rival is, of course, sel de la terre, but the warmth of the bread, and the way that the butter (which is very, very yellow, almost disconcertingly so) melts on it is quite winning.

our waiter was french, and we (by which i mean keith) asked if he was willing to speak to us in french, which he was. i can only hope that one day i will have a real french accent when i speak french. anyway, we ordered our appetizers, which included the soup of the day (vichysoisse), a vegan pate, the housemade pate “with condiments,” the lobster bisque, escargots, the “pasta ribbon with goat cheese crumbs and walnuts,” and a salad. kudos to the restaurant for excellent and unpretentious salad greens – i have really come to hate weird salad mixes, especially “field greens.” “field greens” is really a euphemism for “weird and incongruous mix of tough, bitter salad greens that are shaped like coral.” i also hate it when restaurants are too trendy.

the menu at petit robert bistro is pretty good – it has the standard, plus some more interesting and adventurous things – for example, the tripe as a plat principal. serious points off, though, for the menu in franglais – choose one or the other, or at least have the french and english translations side by side. “spinach au beurre” and “soupe a l’onion …” ok, i forget the last word. but it was in french, and only the word “onion” was in english. the word in french for onion, by the way, is “oignon.” also, hors d’oeuvres are ok, but seriously, this restaurant is owned by french people. they KNOW that “entree” means first course, not main course (which would be plat principal). one cannot claim to be a real french restaurant and then ignore the way the french eat, even if it is just a bistro.

back to the food, which, after all, is the important part. the appetizers, i hear, were all great. i unfortunately couldn’t do much tasting, as i was/am sick. i had the housemade pate, which was really three different pates, plus a tiny salad and a smattering of cornichons. the pates were pretty good, especially the one that i’m pretty sure was really just livers of some kind and butter, but overall, this pate had nothing on the pork rillettes that i had at craigie street bistrot. on the other hand, considering that this pate was half the price, it was pretty darn good. i’m afraid i’ve been spoiled by good food. and the cornichons! i love cornichons. there is no better way to eat pickle-like substances. unless it’s on a hot sub or a fast food, that is.

onto the main course. i had the rabbit – roasted, with mustard, plus julienned leeks. i’m not sure if there were actually any leeks on my plate, but the baby green beans and julienned carrots were nice, anyway. i thought the mustard was fabulous, but the rabbit was a little salty – it was one of those things where you really had to eat a bit of everything in each bite to balance the flavors. i don’t know if it was supposed to be like that; something tells me no. it was, however, huge, or at least seemed so after the appetizer. in fact, there was so much leftover that i asked the waitress to pack it up for me; i usually wouldn’t, but it seemed like it would be a real waste of food. as a testament to how busy the restaurant was, and thus how stretched the service was, she totally forgot about it. i decided not to say anything, though.

dessert was a fun affair – we all got different ones. i had the gateau petit robert, which was essentially a chocolate cake with a little chocolate tour eiffel as a decoration. it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t that good, either – the marjolaine that jessica made me for my birthday far surpassed it. on the other hand, nina’s tarte tatin was absolutely the best tarte tatin i’ve ever had in my life – it could have been a perfect 10. jessica’s boston cream pie was a bit of a letdown – just not as soft as it was supposed to be, and not as cold, either. the vanilla cream part seemed to be a bit off – the flavor wasn’t as clean and vanilla-y as it should have been.

despite the flaws in the food, it was still pretty darn good, and we had a really good time, spending 3 hours there from start to finish. the atmosphere of the restaurant is great, with a funny mix of people, from french people, to old couples, to the young hip. if you want to go out somewhere, go here. but i would rather cook, because it would be just as good, and cheaper.

sunday.
we arrived to an empty foyer. we didn’t have to wait long for the host to appear, but we did have to wait. odd, since it was sunday and the restaurant wasn’t very full at all. the music was better, but i have to say that the service really suffered. when the waitress came back to take our orders, she paused while heading around our table to ask another table how they were doing. ask, yes. but after tending to the party you just flagged down… one of the waiters was looking for something in the silverware bureau, couldn’t find it, slammed the drawer shut and stomped into the kitchen. on the bright side, tonight i had the duck confit with some sort of sausage and the same green beans and carrots, plus braised savoy cabbage. i’m a big fan of braised or sauteed cabbage, which my mother likes to cook at home. the duck was also fantastic, if a bit salty, but the saltiness didn’t seem out of place here. it was also fantastically better with a glass of red wine. nora had the beef bourguignon, which was pretty good. mom had the bouillabaisse and dad had the steak. i’m always surprised by the speed with which mom and dad eat, since my friends and i will spend three hours sitting around the dinner table.

the verdict: so really i’m tired of doing work, and tired of writing, which made this review a bit problematic. it was a good restaurant and it’s a fun place to eat at, but it’s just not really worth the money. you can do better on your own time, in your own kitchen. or rather, come over to my house and i’ll cook for you.